Secret Santa!!!

Thank You Ronda and Olivia!
First of all Alivia LOVED the fact that not only did she get a present from her friend that "has diabetes like me" but that she got a present from a girl who has the same name!

"Ruby" the bear with diabetes!

 I had no idea they even made a girl one, we got the boy one when she was dx and now he has a wife!!! (Alivias words, not mine) The 1st thing Alivia did when she opened her was go get the boy one so they could be together.

We also got an ornament for the Christmas tree...

The Giving Tree book...

This was actually one of the very few books we didn't already own, great pick!

It even came with a picture of Olivia and her big sister Gwen inside and Alivia points to Olivia every night (yes, we've read it every night since we got it!) after we read it and reminds me "this is Olivia, she has diabetes just like me, just incase I have forgotten from the night before!"

A Christmas tree cookie cutter...

Which we put to good use already!

and a super sweet framed poem about families...

Thanks again Ronda and Olivia (& Family) they were such thoughtful gifts that she can keep for the rest of her life! Can't wait for the day when the 2 O/Alivias get to meet each other in person!

Sorry this is so short but my computer and blogger are not getting along very well lately and it's super FRUSTRATING!!!

And what happened to the spell check???

Tag Your It - My Turn

1. Do you like bleu cheese? NO WAY!!!


2. Have you ever smoked? NO WAY!!!


3. Do you own a gun? Nope…hubby made a bad choice in his young stupid days and now we aren’t allowed to have one in our house…something about breaking a police car window…


4. Favorite type of Food? Real Mexican


5. Favorite type of music? Contemporary Christian


6. What do you think of hot dog? We only buy all beef hot dogs, not sure if they’re better but we like to think so!


7. Favorite Christmas movie? The Santa Clause


8. What do you prefer to drink in the morning? Venti 2 pump black and white peppermint mocha, currently decaf


9. Can you do push ups? Probably not with the current baby bump


10. What’s your favorite piece of jewelry? My necklace my mom gave me for my 1st mothers day, I’d love to pass it onto Alivia on her 1st mothers day!


11. Favorite hobby? Taking Photos, scrapbooking, reading and shopping! (is that a hobby?)


12. Do you have A. D. D.? Nope


 13. Do you wear glasses/contacts? Nope


14. Middle name? Ann


15. Name 3 thoughts at this exact moment: 1) Why did my kids get up so early today? 2) I need my coffee! 3) I need to make Christmas cookies today so we can eat them while we decorate the tree tonight.


16. Name 3 drinks you regularly drink: Water, Pepsi and coffee


17. Current worry? My brother!!! He’s leaving for Afghanistan the 2nd week in December :(


18. Current hate right now? That my brother has to leave! And a much smaller hate…I lost my crock pot ???


19. Favorite place to be? Home


20. How did you bring in the new year? Can't remember - probably sleeping!


21. Someplace you’d like to go? I agree with you Laura!!! Anywhere to meet my fellow D moms!!


 22. Name three people who will complete this…hummm who hasn’t done it yet??? Wendy, Shannon and Hallie


23. Do you own slippers? Yep…somewhere, I need to find them though the tile in the kitchen is getting pretty cold these days. 


24. What color shirt are you wearing? Pink


25. Do you like sleeping on satin sheets? Not really, they’re too cold when you first get in.


26. Can you whistle? Yep


27. Where are you now? My room


28. Would you be a pirate? Probably not, unless the pirate ship was like a huge cruise ship!


29. What songs do you sing in the shower? I don’t sing!


30. Favorite Girl’s Name? Alivia and Ava!


31. Favorite boy’s name? Anthony and Blake


32. What is in your pocket right now? No pockets


33. Last thing that made you laugh? Probably something strange Alivia said


34. What vehicle do you drive? Mazda MPV…but I miss my trailblazer everyday :(


35. Worst injury you've ever had? Broke my wrist in January and got to wear a cast from my fingers to my shoulder for 7 weeks! Had to have it “re-set” twice (took 2 grown men to hold me down!) Even after months and months of therapy I’m still not able to turn it all the way over and it still hurts!


36. Do you love where you live? The town…yes. Our current house…no (it’s closing in on us!)


37. How many TVs do you have in your house? 3


38. How many computers do you have in your house? Just 1


39. If you changed your job, what would it be? If I had to work out side the home I’d like to be a labor and delivery nurse.


40. If you were granted three wishes, what would they be?1) A cure. 2) For Alivia to be able to get pregnant easily and have as many healthy babies as she wants 3) To never have to worry about money again

It's a...

17 weeks 2 days...

"I'm a Girl"...Ava Jean!!Leg... Foot... We were all very suprised that it was a girl, everyone including me thought it was a boy! Anthony's a little disappointed that he wont be having a brother, but he's got a LOT of work ahead of him to protect all 3 of his sisters!

World Diabetes Day!

This was our 1st World Diabetes Day, we weren't quite sure what to do for it then the random idea of the hubby and I getting blue ribbon tattoos came to mind! He was totally up for it (as he is for any tattoo) I was pretty scared but thought if my child can be poked with a needle 1500 time in 1 year I can be poked a few thousand (not really sure exactly) for a tattoo honoring her...but then it hit me you're pregnant you can't get a tattoo!!! Well there's always next year for me! Hubby went ahead with it and his sister took my place and got one honoring Alivia too. Here's the hubbys... And here's his sisters, hers is Alivias initials and the dot of the j is the World Diabetes Logo...

Dreams do come true!

A while back I posted about my meltdown when I finally realized my "dream" of finding a perfect insulin to carb ratio for Alivia and getting on with our life wasn't ever going to happen. She'll grow, get sick, stressed, exercise and so on.

Well... dreams do come true! They don't last forever but I'll take what I can get! About 9 weeks ago Alivia had been running high at EVERY blood sugar check, so being that I just took the "insulin adjustment" class I played around with her ratio all on my own and after many tries figured that instead of the 1:30 ratio she was on it needed to be 1:20. We put that into effect and had 8 weeks of PERFECT numbers! Not just 70-200 but 70-150!!! For the first time since being dx I didn't cringe while I waited for the meter to count down I knew it would be perfect. I can't tell you how much of a blessing it was! Alivia was doing great those 8 weeks but I was horrible, my morning sickness was so bad, I ended up losing 15 pounds from throwing up no matter what I ate. I really don't think I could of handled being that sick and fighting with the diabetes monster at the same time. Someone was definitely helping us out!

At the end of our wonderful 8 weeks we had our 3 month endo appt on 10/30 and her A1c was 6.8%! I at first thought we'd be in trouble because it was low but the Dr looked though her log book and only found 1 low (45) so he was really happy with it and so were we! We talked about the pump and he said based on her A1c she didn't need it right now but if I wanted it I could sign up for the classes and get started right away. I compromised and scheduled my classes for 3 months out. I would really like to have the pump established before the new baby comes that way hopefully some of my family members will feel comfortable enough to watch her while I'm in the hospital.

Well at some point you have to wake up from your dream, and that we did when Alivia woke up at 250 last week and spent 3 days in the 300-550 range even after countless corrections. She never had any ketones, fevers or acted sick so she just must be growing or the end of our honeymoon. Either way back to the drawing board for me not only for the insulin to carb ratio but also for the corrections I guess... oh the joy! The good thing is that I'm finally starting to feel better, although I'd take a few more weeks of being sick if that meant I didn't have to fight the diabetes monster! But like I said I'll take what I can get!

Here is my cute little Kitty on Halloween!

Candy Carb Amounts...

At our 3 month endo appt our wonderful Dr sent us home with this list of carb amounts in most of the Halloween candy! Just thought I'd pass it on to the rest of you so you're not forced to eat all the candy just because you don't know the carb amount...although most of us will probably eat it anyways!

Sorry they're kinda hard to read, if anyone can't read it I'd be happy to e-mail it directly so you can enlarge it.

How God Selects the Mother of a Diabetic Child

I copied this from another type 1 mom, most of you probably already read it on facebook but for those of you who haven't here it is...

Most women become mothers by accident, some by choice, a few by social pressures and a couple by habit.

Did you ever wonder how mothers of children with diabetes are chosen?

Somehow I visualize God hovering over earth selecting his instruments for propagation with great care and deliberation. As He observes, He instructs His angels to make notes in a giant ledger.

"Armstrong, Beth, son. Patron Saint Matthew."

"Forrest, Marjorie, daughter, Patron Saint Cecilia."

"Rutledge, Carrie, twins. Patron Saint Gerard. He's used to profanity."

Finally, He passes a name to an angel and smiles, "Give her a child with diabetes." The angel is curious. "Why this one, God? She's so happy."

"Exactly", smiles God. "Could I give child with diabetes to a mother who does not know laughter? That would be cruel."

"But has she the patience?" asks the angel.

"I don't want her to have too much patience, or she will drown in a sea of self-pity and despair. Once the shock and resentment wear off, she'll handle it. I watched her today. She has that feeling of self and independence that is so rare and so necessary in a mother.

You see, the child I am going to give her has his own world. She has to make the child live in her world and that's not going to be easy."

"But, Lord, I don't think she even believes in you."

God smiles. "No matter. I can fix that. This one is perfect. She has just enough selfishness." The angel gasps. "Selfishness? Is that a virtue?"

God nods. "If she cannot separate herself from the child occasionally, she will never survive. Yes, here is a woman whom I will bless with less than perfect."

"She does not realize it yet, but she is to be envied. I will permit her to see clearly the things I see .... ignorance, cruelty, prejudice ... and allow her to rise above them.

She will never be alone. I will be at her side every minute of every day of her life because she is doing my work as surely as if she is here by my side."

"And what about her patron saint?" asks the angel, his pen poised in mid air.

God smiles. "A mirror will suffice."

by Erma Bombeck

Alivia's 3rd Birthday!

Oh my gosh...I can not believe my baby is 3!!!

Seriously though this year has gone by SO fast!

I swear the older I get the faster my kids grow up!

Well this year Alivia chose a "Princess Party", it was mostly family but she had a few friends there. We had all "free" foods to eat and cake of course! I timed it so we would eat the cake at her afternoon snack time so that she'd actually be able to have some, and that she did! She was actually low when we checked her before the cake so we even let her have a little of the frosting.

(Daddy helping Aunt Christy check her blood sugar)

Alivia opening her presents...

And of course every birthday brings the well child visit. It was actually the 1st time seeing her pediatrician since before being dx. She apologized for the advice nurse not putting together all the symptoms I had mentioned during my many many calls to the clinic in the days leading up to the dx and explained to me how really rare it is to see diabetes in a 2 year old, Alivia was the youngest both the pediatrician and the on-call Dr we saw that day had seen with it.

Alivia was right on target for all her developmental goals, except for staying dry through the night. Alivia has been potty trained both day and night since 15 months old, we had to put her in pull-ups at night a few months before being dx and we haven't been able to get her to stay dry at night since! Is this a normal diabetes thing or just a stubborn child?

Well the bid shocker of the day was that she was 40 pounds!!! She was 27 pounds only 4 months ago! She also grew 2 inches since then. This put her in the 50% for height and over the 95% for weight! The Dr was a tiny bit concerned and wants me to talk with her endo about meeting with the nutritionist again.

The Dr was really impressed with how quickly Alivia has adjusted to the whole thing! And how well she just does what needs to be done without any kind of reward other than a verbal praise. She picks what finger she wants poked, actually pushes the button on the lancet to poke herself and picks where she wants her shot (usually one of her arms unless I tell her is the Lantus then it goes in her tummy). She was also amazed that her A1c went down from 14.1% to 7.7% in just 2 months!

Walk to Cure Diabetes...

"Diabetic Princess"

Sunday, October 4th was our 1st Walk to Cure Diabetes! We all had a blast! It started with a pancake breakfast (which is Alivia's FAVORITE breakfast)

n n n

Then we went on our 3 mile walk! I had no idea it would be SO long, but I'm so glad I brought the stroller! It was so nice to have our families there to support Alivia. My dad who recently had back surgery and needs both hips replaced was determined walked the 1st mile with us, and he did! My brother even made the 4 hour drive from Ft. Lewis on his only day off to be with us. My Mom, Sister, other brother, his wife, their 1 year old, my mother, sister and brother in law were all also there. Alivia knew everyone was there for her!

( my momma, sister, and sister-in-law)

(my dad and brother)

(Alivia with her Uncle & Auntie Shell)

All our shirts said "We love our Diabetic Princess" and Alivia's of course just said

"Diabetic Princess". She was very proud of her shirt :)

Surprisingly her blood sugar numbers cooperated all day, she was a bit high after breakfast but that's too be expected since she doesn't get a shot until after she eats and those pancakes were loaded with carbs! It was wonderful that they had all the nutrition facts posted at all the food booths! Now if only EVERY restaurant would do the same!

Crossing the finish line!!!

----------------------------

I know I still have a TON of updating to do, the last 7 week have been so rough! This by far has been my worst case of morning sickness aka: ALL DAY EVERY DAY SICKNESS! I'm just getting to the 12 week mark so hopefully things get better soon! Alivia's been such a great helper, she rubs my back when I throw up, covers me with a blanket when I lay on the couch and brings me water all the time. She's going to be a great big sister!

Our Family Is growing by 2 Feet!!

I promise a update is coming soon!!! But I couldn't wait to announce that...

I'm Pregnant!!!

Our baby is expected to arrive on or around April 30th 2010.

We were actually "trying" before Alivia was dx but then we decided it probably wasn't the best time to be having another baby so it was put on hold, but God had other plans for us!

It was only a dream...

After sitting and crying while reading everyones blogs this week about scary lows and crazy highs I completely lost it...I must of been in some sort of dream world...I really had it in my mind that if I could just hang in there and get past this crazy honeymoon period things would actually get better, we'd find her perfect insulin to carb ratio and we'd be on our way never looking back to all this craziness! Well the dream is now gone and I'm crushed! ********************************************* In other news I forgot to post that Alivia's celiac disease test came back negative! YAY!!! Her 1st A1c...14.1 ummm...not so good

I want an annulment!...This "Honeymoon" Sucks!!!

I am so beyond frustrated with this "honeymoon" phase! We were kinda looking forward to it when they told us her pancreas would start working on it's own and she wouldn't need much insulin, and it started out well... she was only getting 1/2 unit of NovoLog for every 45 grams and her numbers were great!!! But of course when I feel like I can handle this it all has to change, now her pancreas works when ever it wants and gives off random amounts, it mostly does it after I correct for a super high blood sugar then it's nice enough to spit out some insulin and make her drop really low! And of course it doesn't do it all the time and there's no way of knowing when it will happen. Just plain frustrating! Did everyone's kids go through this honeymoon phase? How long did it last? Her Dr told me it can last up to a year!

Beach Trip... (mostly pictures)

Last weekend we went with my family to the beach and rented a big beach house. Other than blood sugar numbers in the 550's, it was a ton of fun!

Our beach house

Alivia and Anthony testing out the water...

It was freezing!!!

Playing in the sand...

Anna, Anthony and Alivia

Alivia's 1st and Last smore...I gave her insulin right after she ate it but her 1am check was 554!

Facebook?

Does anyone have facebook? I'd love to have someone to chat a bit with during the day :)

No more NPH...Yay!!!

So when leaving the hospital we were given set meal times with a set amount of carbs and a set amount of insulin... 7:30am Breakfast-45 grams-4 1/2 NovoLog & 4 1/2 NPH 9:30am Snack- 15-30 grams 11:30am Lunch-60 grams 3:30pm Snack- 15-30 grams 5:30pm Dinner- 45grams-4 1/2 NovoLog & 5 1/2 Lantus 7:00pm Snack- 15-30grams with correction to be given at lunch, bedtime and 1am if needed Well we thought no big deal, this girl loves to eat and if not she'll drink milk or juice no problem...well we were WRONG! The first few weeks went well, no lows, she was eating what was offered, other than a few daddy mishaps it really wasn't too bad. Then all of the sudden she started out right refusing to eat or drink at lunch which was so not good being that her NPH peeks at lunch time, so for about a week she had Dr.Pepper for lunch, not my idea of a balanced meal! And she also started dropping into the 50's several times a day, refusing to drink a juice box, once again good old Dr. Pepper to the rescue! We had an appt with our educator last Monday and we talked a lot about struggling with the set doses and a 2 year old with a mind of her own and she talked with our Dr. about taking her off the NPH for now and letting us let her eat the amount she wants then us figuring out her dose. It's an extra shot but it's worked out well for the most part and she's back to eating normal (must of just been a control issue) the only real struggle now is that she's entered into her "honeymoon" period and her blood sugars have been dropping rapidly,she's been below 50 at least 14 times since last Monday! We're on the phone daily with the insulin adjustment line and have gone from a 1:10 ratio to a 1:20 in a matter of a week, and her Lantus is down from 5 1/2 to 2units at dinner.

Weight gain!

When I took Alivia to the Dr to get her fingers and toes checked out they weighed her and she's already gained the 7 pounds she had lost before being diagnosed!

(right before being diagnosed)

(THE CHEEKS ARE BACK!...YAY!)

"oops"

So while I was at work this morning I received a txt from my hubby..."You gave her her shot this morning right?"...WHAT!? In a panic I called right away... "What do you mean I gave her her shot? When I left for work you were getting her breakfast ready and since we give her the shot after she's done eating there's no way I could of given her the shot I wasn't even home!" ..."Oh crap I forgot. What do I do?" Call the dr! Which he does and gets everything all figured out. I came home early just as she had finished her lunch (apple juice and pancakes) I ask about her blood sugar before lunch..."Crap I forgot to take it!" SERIOUSLY!?...you're messing with my baby's life! "I forgot" is getting old! This is the 4th time he's "oops-ed" We will be having a serious discussion when he gets home tonight!

Peeling fingers and toes???

Last Monday I noticed what looked like a popped blister on Alivias thumb, she said it didn't so didn't really think about it much and just avoided it for the finger pokes. Then over the next few days I started noticing all her fingers starting looking that way. Then on Saturday morning I notice it was happening on her toes too.

I called her endo cause I thought it might have something to do with the blood sugar pokes (we use her toes at night). She said she'd never heard of that being associated with diabetes at all but knows it can happen with kids who have a bad virus. She said if I was worried about it I could take her to her regular pediatrician... Hello all my daughters skin is peeling off! Of course I'm worried about it. Luckily our clinic is open every weekend for urgent care so she got to see one of our regular Dr's. She said it was probably caused by the amount of stress her body had been through and since it wasn't infected she wasn't too worried about it and thinks it will go away on it's own. However my step-daughters mom said she's heard about it in children with diabetes when they're first diagnosed cause of lack of nutrients or something like that. Has anyone ever heard of this? It creeps me out and we're running out of fingers and toes to poke!

My first day back to work...

So Thursday was my first day back to work and even though I dreaded going I sucked it up and went...Daddy sat in on all the teaching and soaked up all the knowledge just as I did so no major worries. First of all my kids don't go to daycare, I work from 6:45am-1:45pm and my hubby works from 3-11pm so they're always with one of us! Well I left the house at 6:30am and everyone was still asleep. I got to work and txt my husband at 7:30 just so see what her number was cause when he did the 1am check she was 119 (the lowest she's been since being home from the hospital) but got no response, so I called his cell and the house phone...no answer. I tried again and again left quite a few messages how he needs to keep his phone on him at all times...blah blah. By about 9:25 I started to panic and decided to go home and check in. When I was about 5 minutes away (9:32 to be exact) he finally answered his phone! I told him I'd been trying to call all morning and I wanted to make sure she got her shot at 7:30 this morning...his only response was we've been busy!...ERRRR! So when I walked in the house Alivia was sitting at the table with a bowl of cereal....humm that's too many carbs for snack time I say (which is to be eaten at 9:30). That's cause it's breakfast I'm told! So I check the meter to see what time the check was done...9:34am! After I'd talked to him!!! So I very calmly walk upstairs to my room to calm down a bit...my desk is a wreck! Some one colored all over every thing and pushed all sorts of buttons on my computer...classic signs of a bored 2 year old who's Dad is still sleeping!!! So I ask my 4 year old...yep Daddy just woke up! I was so pissed!!! Yes we all make mistakes but don't hide the truth from me! And why not put your phone next to the bed in case you over sleep! I'm so frustrated!...Why doesn't he take this a seriously as I do? A two hour difference might not make a huge difference in anything other than the fact it threw off the whole days schedule but what if she was really low this morning keeps running through my mind! Am I totally over reacting???

Thank you!

I just wanna tell all of you that have posted comments on my blog Thank You for taking the time to let me know that you're all here for me! I don't have to tell you cause you all already know but it really does help to know there are other mothers out there that are going through is with their own children!

My First Break Down

During the time in the hospital we ever given so much information from so many people (some of which came from people who weren't Drs and had no business opening their mouths) that I just felt so completely overwhelmed! Now that we've been home the realness of this is finally setting in. I find myself praying every time I check her blood that they made a mistake and her levels are back to normal and this is over with! I had my first break down in the isle of our grocery store while holding a box of Dora fruit snacks (her favorite snack)...she'll never be able to enjoy them again. She'll never have another day that doesn't include counting carbs, shots and finger pokes. Will she even get to remember what a care free life she enjoyed before this? I used to strongly believe that everything happened for a reason but I really can't think of any reason why this needed to happen to my baby girl!

The Diagnosis...

From what we can remember Alivia's symptoms really started showing about 2 months ago. She'd been potty trained for over a year and all of the sudden she started wetting the bed and having accidents during the day and whenever we in the car. She also started drinking a TON of water and anything else she could get her hands on, she even started "stealing" other peoples drinks and chugging then down! About 2 weeks ago I called the advise nurse at our clinic and told her about this, she thought maybe she had a bladder infection and the front desk scheduled me for May 29Th to see the Dr. I knew it wasn't a bladder infection and because of a good friend of mine who's son has type 1 I planned on asking her Dr. to check her for diabetes. Sadly she didn't make it to that appt before becoming REALLY sick. On Sunday May 17th we noticed she had lost her appetite and she became really tired. By Tuesday she started throwing up, her heart was racing and she was breathing really hard...so I called the advice nurse back with the new symptoms, she told me to give her sips of sugared soda and call back in a few hours, which I did. This time I told her she kept the soda down but was still really lethargic, she told me to keep up on the soda and let her "sleep it off". She continued throwing up through out the night and first thing in the morning I called the advice nurse back and told her I wanted to see the dr NOW! I put her in the car for the 20 minute drive to the clinic, she slept the whole time and was having a really hard time breathing, I really wanted to pull over and call an ambulance but I knew I could get her there faster. We made it to the clinic and waiting in the waiting room for a good 10-15 minutes...no rush to them, she just has a little stomach bug. The nurse called her back and weighted her...I was so shocked to see 27pounds!...she lost 7 pounds in a month! The dr came back and I went over the symptoms again and brought to his attention the weight loss. He decided she needed an IV and sent us over to the hospital. He said if she perked up we could go home by the afternoon if not we'd need to stay over night. We got up to our room at Southwest and the first thing the nurse asked was if they checked her glucose level, I told her no and told her about wanting to get her tested because of the bed wetting. She assured me the dr would test her today. They got her IV started and she continued sleeping. About an hour later the nurse came back in and told me my suspicions about diabetes was correct and her blood sugar was at 583! She said they would be moving her down to the emergency room and a critical care transport ambulance from Legacy Emanuel Children's Hospital would be coming to get her and take her to the ICU there. Down in the ER the dr told me that not only were her glucose levels high but that her Keytones were at 6! And she had Ketoacidosis which is a serious condition that can lead to diabetic coma. They started her on insulin and we waited for the transport team. We spent about 24 hours in ICU before we started seeing her improve. We were moved into a regular room and the learning process began. We met with educators constantly and set up a food plan and shot schedule for her. After 4 days in the hospital we finally felt comfortable enough to take her home with us!